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.·:*¨¨*:·.Mer.·:*¨¨*:·.

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Question [15 May 2008|05:30pm]
So if I start using this thing again, is anyone going to be reading it?
2 KissesKiss me

Survey for 2006 [29 Dec 2006|11:19am]
2006:

1. go to a party?: Yeah
2. try something new?: Yeah...
3. have someone change your life?: Yeah
4. kiss someone?: Yeah
5. tell your family and friends you love them?: Yeah
6. buy something extravagant?: A car? Except my parents bought it so I guess it doesn't count
7. do something nice for you?: Probably
8. do something terribly wrong?: Yeah
9. move?: No
10. go to a concert?: Nope

best of the year:
1. party: This is a hard one..I'll just go with my 18th birthday party to make it easy
2. show: Still Family Guy
3. CD: Justin Timberlake at this point
4. movie: Pirates of the Caribbean 2
5. song: Maneater by Nelly Furtado
6. experience: Shrooms!!
7. concert: Didn't go to any
8. book: Yeah I don't think I read too many of those this year
9. month: April or May
10. day: The day I went to the strip club with KT! haha good times

worst of the year:
1. party: Any party with me and Mike fighting..wayyy too many to list
2. show: I don't watch the shows that are bad how would I know?
3. CD: That Fergie CD
4. movie: I honestly don't remember like half the movies I've seen
5. song: London Bridge - Fergie
6. experience: Like I said..getting laid..at the same time..it was the best and worst
7. concert: Didn't go to any
8. book: The Motorcycle Diaries lol
9. month: August or maybe October?
10. Day: October 14th. Day of Mike's sisters wedding.

hopes for 2006:
1. predict something that you think will happen in 2006?: I'll get good grades in college.
2. what do you hope changes about your country?: No more war
3. what do you hope for yourself?: I hope I stop dating guys that aren't worth my time.
4. what do you hope for your family?: I hope they stop hating me for the shit that just happened.
5. what do you hope for your best friend?: I hope all of them don't get too fucked up and forget what is really important in life.

during 2005:
1. where were you when it began?: Britt and Ben's house!
2. did you stay up?: Hell yeah
3. what was your new year wish?: I don't remember
4. how many boyfriends?: One..
5. broke up?: Yeah. Finally.
6. have any crushes?: I guess you could say that.
7. care to mention names?: Well I guess Ashton now since I dated Mike pretty much all of the rest of this year.
8. new friends?: Duh I started college lots of new friends, important ones would probably be Katie!
9. had to say goodbye?: More then you know.
10. missed anyone?: Yeah
11. win anything?: Nope
12. best place you went to?: New York was the only place I went..again
13. worst place you went to?: New York was the only place I went!
14. happiest moment?: A night when Mike didn't treat me like shit.
15. how was your birthday?: It was pretty good.
16. best present?: The earrings Ben gave me that I lost cuz of fucking Mike.

January: Had sex with Charlie..I don't know..that's all I remember from this month. I met Mike at the end of it.
February: Started going out with Mike.
March: I think this was when I tried shrooms with Mike. Had spring break was nothing special.
April: Had my 18th birthday which was fun as hell.
May: Shit with Mike started going bad cuz he was on coke and I tried it.
June: I graduated and the summer came and things with Mike got worse and worse and worse.
July: Things with Mike were getting even worse.
august: And this is probably where they got really fucking bad. I got my new car.
September: Started college, which was fun.
October: Mike's sisters wedding..where shit with Mike hit the fan..for the millionth time.
November: Hung out with Julian and tried X, partied a shit load over thanksgiving break.
December: Finished my first quarter in college, got a DUI, and finally finally finally broke up with Mike for good. Started hanging out with new friends.
1 KissKiss me

Wow [04 Oct 2006|05:17pm]
[ mood | thoughtful ]

So I just have to add the fact today is 5 years. Wow is all I have to say.

Kiss me

updatesss [02 Apr 2006|07:02pm]
[ mood | calm ]

Yeah okay so it's been a long time since I've updated. Lots to talk about.

Me and Mike are still together. We're doing amazing. It's weird having a boyfriend after all these years of not taking guys seriously. My senior year spring breaks is over now. It was kind of shitty since Mike wasn't on his and I don't know..I just ended up hanging out with random people that I hadn't seen in a while and it was weird. So now I'm waiting for my 18th birthday. Which is in 8 days! I'm having a huge party at Mike's house. That'll be funnnn. Then prom is this month. I already have my dress and shoes. I'll definietly post pictures of that. I can't wait. I can't believe my senior year is almost over. Two months from today I'm graduating. That is crazy to me. I don't even feel like myself anymore. This whole party scene has really taken me over and I don't even like it that much anymore. Except I only get depressed when I think about it, but I only think about it when I'm on something..so I don't know how that works. But I don't know, I'm doing well. I just got a new job since Quiznos is gay as hell. And I'm on the honor roll at school. I don't know I still feel bad. I don't really know what else to talk about. I barley ever use this thing anymore, I guess I outgrew it. I use myspace all the time though. I don't know. Hmm..what else do I have to say..nothing really..I'm try to update after my party and tell you how that went. But I don't know..don't hold your breath lol

<33 Maria

2 KissesKiss me

Updates [21 Feb 2006|09:41pm]
Wow I haven't written in here in forever. I don't really have time anymore. Some updates though..well I'm going out with this guy Mike Stetson now. It's been two weeks. I like him and it's a change. I tried shrooms with him the other night. They were fun as hell. I got into UC. I'm going to study psychology. I think it's crazy that I am fucking graduating this year. I turn 18 in a month and a half. That'll be fun as hell. That's about all I have going on.

later

mer
5 KissesKiss me

dude i have gotten fucked up over the years [13 Jan 2006|04:07am]
DisorderRating
Paranoid Disorder:Moderate
Schizoid Disorder:Low
Schizotypal Disorder:High
Antisocial Disorder:Moderate
Borderline Disorder:Moderate
Histrionic Disorder:High
Narcissistic Disorder:High
Avoidant Disorder:Moderate
Dependent Disorder:High
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:Low

-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --
-- Personality Disorders --

Kiss me

Happy New Year [01 Jan 2006|12:22pm]
Well it's fair to say I had fun last night..as far as I remember. lol
Kiss me

Survey for 2005 [29 Dec 2005|02:48pm]
2005:

1. go to a party?: Yeah
2. try something new?: Yeah...
3. have someone change your life?: Probably in a bad way
4. kiss someone?: Yeah
5. tell your family and friends you love them?: Yeah
6. buy something extravagant?: Uhh not really
7. do something nice for you?: Probably
8. do something terribly wrong?: Sort of
9. move?: No
10. go to a concert?: 311, and MSI

best of the year:
1. party: Well this is a hard one..probably one of the ones over the summer with those Milford kids..like one of Mark Bresser's or Ben Tempe's.
2. show: Two words..Family Guy.
3. CD: Pretty Ricky haha I don't know
4. movie: Sin City
5. song: Grind On Me by Pretty Ricky
6. experience: Uhh..getting laid ahah
7. concert: 311
8. book: One of those Gossip Girl novel books
9. month: July or August
10. day: Wow. One of the days Ann was here..that we didn't fight..those were good.

worst of the year:
1. party: Probably that hotel party...with Logan..but at the same time that party was good..
2. show: I don't even know I don't watch TV
3. CD: I don't know, I only listen to good music
4. movie: Uhh..that movie I rented with Tanya on paper view the other night..ahahaha
5. song: My Humps - Black Eyed Peas
6. experience: Like I said..getting laid..at the same time..it was the best and worst
7. concert: I only went to two and they were both good
8. book: I read like 3 books probably and they were all good. lol
9. month: Uhh..end of November/beginning of December
10. Day: Probably my birthday..because Ben had to sleep threw it.

hopes for 2006:
1. predict something that you think will happen in 2006?: I'll graduate and go to college
2. what do you hope changes about your country?: I don't really care...
3. what do you hope for yourself?: I hope I don't change into someone I really don't want to be.
4. what do you hope for your family?: I hope they are all healthy..and well..and happy and stuff
5. what do you hope for your best friend?: I hope all of them don't get too fucked up and forget what is really important in life.

during 2005:
1. where were you when it began?: In Mason with Danielle at some party
2. did you stay up?: Hell yeah
3. what was your new year wish?: I don't remember
4. how many boyfriends?: Uhh official boyfriends that asked me out..I think one..that I didn't even like..but I dated like freaking 5 million people lol
5. broke up?: I dumped him haha
6. have any crushes?: Yeah
7. care to mention names?: Ohh geez..Ben..duh..Sean Bolland, Logan Stevens, if I continue listing these off they will all be guys from Milford..but I guess those were the main two that I liked
8. new friends?: A bunch of people from Milford..and a couple other schools..
9. had to say goodbye?: Yeah..when certain people moved away.
10. missed anyone?: Hell yeah..I always miss people
11. win anything?: Not that I can recall
12. best place you went to?: New York I guess, it was like the only place I went
13. worst place you went to?: I'd say Michigan but I was really high that whole trip so it wasn't that bad but since I didn't go anywhere else that's my answer.
14. happiest moment?: Probably one of those nights with Logan were he wasn't a dick
15. how was your birthday?: Horrible, I spent most of the day crying.
16. best present?: The necklace and earrings that Ben gave me for my birthday

January: Spent a lot of time depressed over Ben or Marylou or something else stupid. Hung out with Danielle at a lot of parties. Went to OSU with Whitney for a party.
February: Spent more time being all pissed off and hating everything. I really hated school at this point.
March: The month was boring until spring break where I partied the whole time as usual. Danielle's birthday party, the party at Sheida's house..other nights being fucked up..fun SB.
April: Spring break continued to be a blast. Had my birthday which was horrible. But the next weekend Ben made it up to me and I was all on adderal and told Teddy everything on how I felt about Ben. It was crazy. Had a good 4.20 haha
May: Started being really close friends with Teddy..Zach died and all that stuff was going on with the funeral and stuff..depressing time of the year. Graduation at the end of the month was depressing since half my friends were going to leave me.
June: School got out..lots of graduation parties..I hung out with Ben and Teddy all the time..Had some interesting stuff going on with those two. lol Started hanging out with Brittany and Ashlie a little..basically just partied every night.
July: Ann came..started hanging out with Brittany all the time..met all those Milford kids..was fucked up every day like usual..4th of July was crazy. Went to NY at the end of the month..partied a little there but not too much.
august: Partied every day again until school started..actually either way I think I got fucked up every day lol Met more of the Milford kids, dated Sean...School started and things got gay cuz I hate school...Went to the 311 concert with Britt before school started
September: Started hanging out with Ashlie all the time..went out with Dan..ew..basically just partied more..that's all I do now a days..didn't go to like any school functions..I honestly don't remember much of these few months.
October: Uhh..I partied..went to the MSI concert on Halloween...I don't know what else I did..God I wish I didn't party this much so I could remember what I did.
November: This is where the fucked up shit started. I started hanging out with the Milford kids again a lot..lost my virginity on the 22nd to Logan at the hotel...it was all fucked up..but I was fucked up the whole time anyway..thanksgiving break was cool..just hung out with Milford kids all the time..
December: Things got all dramatic...I hung out with the Milford kids a lot at first and then I stopped because they are all dicks..I guess got on a lot of guys..the whole rebound thing..yeah..here I am now.
2 KissesKiss me

Yep. [14 Dec 2005|09:59pm]
I definitely am.
Kiss me

... [10 Dec 2005|09:48am]
So I just might be an even bigger idiot.

Stay tuned.
1 KissKiss me

A real update [27 Nov 2005|03:36pm]
[ mood | okay ]

Okay well this is an update for a very special LJ friend. You know who you are. lol.

Okay so this break has been pretty good, besides the whole Tuesday night thing still lingering in my head. I wonder how long it'll be before it goes away. Probably a while. I've been with Scott and Jarrett every single day for over a week. They have become two of my closest friends.
Jarrett, me, ScottCollapse ) So they've been helping me threw the whole thing. Even though it was sort of their fault since they introduced me to him. Anyway, everything else in my life has pretty much been the same as always. Okay well I don't feel like writing more..maybe next time.

later

mer

7 KissesKiss me

... [23 Nov 2005|04:04pm]
[ mood | nauseated ]

I'm an idiot.

2 KissesKiss me

So basically.. [21 Nov 2005|09:51pm]
[ mood | ecstatic ]

I am doing amazing.
I have found the most amazing guy.
If I wasn't so lazy I'd write more details.
Maybe a picture of me and him some time later.
But I just wanted to let everyone know, I am happy.
For the first time in a lonnnng time, I'm happy.

1 KissKiss me

Ahh..changes [03 Nov 2005|10:09pm]
[ mood | nostalgic ]

So I know I never write anymore..I just got sick of writing out everything I do. It's not that interesting. So right now I'm basically freaking out because in a few months I graduate..and it just seems like a really big step in life. It always seemed to far away and it's so close now. And with every day it's only getting closer and it's so scary. Pretty soon my summer as a teenager will be over..and just my teenage years will be over..it's so scary.

I've had so much fun over the years and it's crazy to think it'll be over soon. I miss spending time with people the way I used to. I miss caring for people the way I used to.

So for Halloween I went to a concert at Bogarts with Ben, Nate, and Lauren. It was pretty cool. It's crazy that this'll be my last Halloween in high school. Everything just seems to be a last of something. It's crazy. And I think I'm not even like enjoying it as much as I should be. I mean I didn't even go to my senior year homecoming game, or dance. But mostly I can't believe I missed the game. I've gone to every homecoming game since like at least 7th grade. I'm losing all my "childhood" friends. Well as close to childhood as they were. I mean my old friends for like 7th and 8th grade. I hardly talk to anyone from back then. Besides maybe like 5 people tops. Well I guess those are the 5 people who matter, but I still miss a lot of people I might never hang out with again, if I even talk to some of them. The sad thing is they might never even think of me. Well, I'll miss them. They have a really big part of my heart and I'll always remember them. It's scary to think I'm almost an adult. Anyway, I'm out.

mer

10 KissesKiss me

I'm a senior bitches [20 Oct 2005|07:01pm]
[ mood | happy ]

I got my senior pictures back today. I'm pretty excited about it. They came with a CD so I think I'll post some on here later so the people who won't see me can see some of the good ones.

later

mer

2 KissesKiss me

umm [04 Oct 2005|05:12pm]
4 years ladies and gents.

4 years.
7 KissesKiss me

It's definitely too small of a world [25 Sep 2005|10:34pm]
[ mood | confused ]

So I decided I should finally write. I guess something happened worth writing about. So last night I was at BJ's house for a party. Anyway to make a long story shorter...here's what went down. I was talking to his sister and I found out she graduated from Milford. So of course I asked her about all the Milford kids I knew. And of course she ended up knowing them all. Then she invited this kid Mike to go to her party, who I got on at one of Ben T's parties over the summer. I hadn't seen him since then. It was really fucked up. Andy was there too. It was cool seeing him I guess, but just weird. I don't know I guess I was just really fucked up and it wigged me out.

I think I need to smoke a bowl.

I'm sick of this.
No one understands why the things that happen to me bother me so much sometimes.
And that pisses me off.
Someone out there please listen? And understand?
Yeah right.

Whatever.

mer

Kiss me

To all my friends in college right now [01 Sep 2005|09:15pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

To all those people I've known for years..you know who you are..

So after all this time
I'm going to write another rhyme
To let you know
The things I never show
I'm going to miss you
And I hope you miss me too
It seems that this day came to fast
The days seemed long but it didn't last
I hope when you're miles away
You'll think of me every day
I hope when you make new friends
You'll remember me until the end
I know I'll never forget you
And all the things you got my through
Without you these past few years
I would have spent in a lot more tears
But you were always there
When no one else would care
I just want to thank you
For being so true
For not letting me down
When no one else was around



I know it's lame..but I had to write something about everyone going away :(

2 KissesKiss me

First day of school and stuff [25 Aug 2005|09:50pm]
[ mood | okay ]

So Tuesday was the first day of school. I guess it's all right.
First block- Trig. Well I wanted to drop the class but they wouldn't let me so oh well. Teresa is in that class which is cool so it works.
Second block- Speech. Good class. A bunch of cool people. I like it.
Third/Forth- It was gym but now I finally got it switched to me being an aide for Ms.Lawler. Ben's in that class too so it's all good.
Fifth- Creative Witting, Once again lots of cool people and stuff.
Lunch is really cool too. So I guess at least first semester won't be that bad.

First football game tomorrow. Yay.

Anyway, I'm out.

mer

1 KissKiss me

...I don't even know [22 Aug 2005|09:16pm]
[ mood | cranky ]

Okay I really don't remember what I've been doing. Some of the more memorable things were going to the 311 concert with Britt. It was pretty cool. Saw a ton of people we knew there. It was pretty cool. She moved to North Carolina though so I was sad about that. Hung out with Ashlie a couple nights ago and we went to some party in Fairfield. That was all right. Basically I've just been partying the last few days of summer. Tomorrow school starts which sucks. This summer was so good. I'm depressed it's over. Anyway I'm out.

later

mer

Kiss me

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